To the trucker who put his lights on, trying to intimidate me into speeding up:

I’m already doing the speed limit- leave me alone. Plus- a pickup truck just turned into this lane; which means I would have had to slow down anyway. You know this road is hazardous- I’m not getting into an accident, just because you want me to go faster. Chill.

To the little white Mazda on my butt all the way up the road to my job:

I’m not getting a speeding ticket, just because you are late. Leave earlier, and you might even have time to get breakfast. See how this works?

Also- if I stop suddenly- I will total your little itty bitty car. Back off!